(1)
Snake Eyes
stay the fuck away from me
and if I catch a glimpse of you
in a crowded bar
I'll knock back my drink
and leave

The only way
you'll ever have me
is unconscious
in a parking lot
bleeding

(2/3)
Fucking Fairies and Sheep,
I shan't expect to see your faces
in this hemisphere
or vicinity
but just in case
know that I'm finished
and you can crash
but not into me.

(4)
You tiny little men
ought to grow a spine

(5)
I can't believe the amount of time
I spent reveling in the caress of your lips
and the slant of your eyes and cheeks
I suppose it was because they were novel to me

(6)
Remember the way you cupped my face
in your hands
and kissed me in front of our friends
as you walked out the door?

And remember the way I insulted you
and you screamed
loud to fill up your tiny little house

I can't make the noises I could
when I was with you
because I'm a broken girl
and my mouth just doesn't sing like it
used to
and I wonder if you liked anything other
than what those songs did for you

(7)
It's funny that you had
easy access
that you never used
and never shall use
because you're Bastard Scum
but at the time I was
totally crushed out

How could a 17 year old girl
possibly see through
her own hazy eyes
to how you meant to be?

(8)
Sorry, but
I still don't know you
and don't care to
although I'm sure you're sweet.

(9)
The night we met
I put my tongue in your mouth
and you said
my number was the only one
that didn't wash off your arm.

I wrote it in eyeliner
so I don't believe that story.

Irregardless,
it had to be you
that would be the beginning
of everything
the unraveling
that would eventually break me.

(10)
And when everything else
let us down
we turned to each other
and I still fall open
for you
like a petal
although you know
so much more than you ever should

because you're my big brother
and we're a perverse idea
but fantastic
and I could spend hours
worshipping you as the false idol
I know you are

(11)
Shame shame shame
on you
for seeming so simple
and being so
untruthful

(12)
You've got to be
the prettiest thing
I've ever seen
but I can't drag you through
what they all do to me

because you mean nothing
in the grand scheme
you're just a mark
a tally
on a tree

(13)
I wouldn't do that again
and I don't worry
that you'll come back
after ignoring me in the hall
for 8 months.

(14)
The first of your kind
and you looked like
an aryan posterchild
and you hurt me
in the backseat of my car

and you called me
and acted like nothing was wrong
well maybe
you shouldn't backhand your bitches
if you want them to
accept your calls

(15)
Goodness gracious
this one trips me up
because you kissed harder than Chris
and wiggled your way
into my bed
to sleep
for only sleep
and how I love sleep
and sleeping next to you

And I can't be sixteen anymore
waiting around for the day
when my hollywood coincidence comes
so off I go

(16)
Trying to secure
some dignity
and I can see
you don't even remember me

you aren't going to call me
for chrissakes you didn't even wake me

So you see
it's been a lot of time
since most of you first met me
and I can't be the way
I used to be

I'm sick
and my head has been done in
I can barely keep off the tears
and so I drink
as always
but with more desperation
and I get sicker
and I get sick

and I hope someone can take care
and see that they need to
come clean up
the mess they've helped make
someone needs to stick me back in my cage
of selfish but needless riteousness

shut the door
turn the key
throw it away.