okay, so this is my last entry of 2002.
um, it's not a happy one.

i sort of wish i were dead.
i am going to attempt to drink myself to death tonight. or do my damndest.
why do i bother?
i listen to too much sad music.

we need vodka. i hope we can bring it. we need to drop dead, for real, cos i can't handle it. KOM got a label offer. i don't want to take it. we also got a comp/A&R offer. i don't want to take it. i want to kick the crap out of the ones who keep upping and leaving, how can you walk away from such a mess....

bleeding hell, bleeding from between my legs, bleeding mind
i see things that aren't there
i find things that aren't found
i seek things that can't be sought
i snow and cover my own eyes with white
and while i cry
while i cry
while i sob in bed at night

i wonder who will bring me
back to life...