It was out of the blue
but I still should've figured
it would always end up you
the hand that pulls me out of this
just like everything else I've been through

I've always admired your insouciant vocabulary
the words that you choose they genuinely move me
but I twist everything you say inside my head
until it means what I want it to mean

like that I will always have
a twisted little corner of your black heart
and you will always have
a place in my ever expanding plans for self-destruction

Because I wanna be
Exactly the way I was when you were with me
Yes I wanna be
exactly the way you remember me being

and we're so alike and
we take so much joy in each other
and all of our hobbies and interests are similar
I wonder if I were where you were would
we still love each other

because it's been 8 years
since you first tried to leave me
the last time you touched me it ignited memories
your body tastes milky your touch turns me jelly
and yet all I wanna do is lie down beside you

and lay my head on your chest
and hear your heart beat pounding underneath
the effect of my proximity
because you will always have
a line in my will and a place in my dreams for the future
whatever they may be

because I wanna be
exactly the way you remember me being
and I wanna be
everything that you've assigned to me lately

a walk on the beach,
a bug in a rug
a bratty little fuck
a kiss for good luck
the girl of your dreams
the time of the season
the wind and the waves and whisper of the sea
a reminder of everything you used to be
and the time and energy you spent getting over it
all of these promises all of these meanings
just to breathe
and be alone with me