Back when my hair was unbelievable blonde
and both our faces
were memorialized innocent
and our relationship was proven
by the placement of our hands
in three real photographs
taken by my best friend
there was confidence written on our bodies

because back when my hips were
wide like a river
and you were not fighting too much
and we lived lies for the other�s benefit
we would touch beneath clothing
and sneak downstairs at parties
and tell stories to her

those pictures were of the night
we came clean to her about
back when we were looking for a glass
we were really fucking on the kitchen table
then we kissed in front of her
and I sat on his lap
he and I wearing blue and pink
leopard print bras, respectively

that one confession
triggered a series of changes for us
and for two years after
I blamed my own lies
for our shortcomings
but it was your lie
that ruined us

you fell in love
with a girl who looked like me
talked like me
walked like me
and until two years after
I still smiled on these photographs
and tried to pretend
that they were not like a knife
in my best friend�s back
but I know
she gave them away
because they were like staring at a carwreck

My christening for the year
Had been Miss Carwreck
And I blew up that next year
And became simply a wreck.
I lost you and my best friend
on New Year�s Eve
and all I have left
are these photographs
which divine the future
that I never could�ve foreseen